Quilt #73 Terry Powell donated by Mary Duke and Stacey Tate

Stacey, Terry and Mary

 Quilt #73 was gifted to Terry Powell. Since being back in Utah, I have spent some quality time with Terry and really appreciate her strength. Terry embodies the concept of endurance. She suffers with a rare neurological disorder called Cervical Dystonia for which there is no cure.

The disorder is characterized by involuntary contractions in the neck causing pain. possible twisting and distortion of the neck. One of the things that helps Terry's symptoms are botox shots which she receives about every three months. The botox helps but she generally has a short period of time before the botox wears off and the spasms begin anew causing the contracting and pain all over again.

Mary and I had talked about making a quilt for Terry. At our weekly quilting get together, I was working on this quilt  when Terry volunteered to sew a couple of seams. She remarked on how beautiful it was and each additional step she seemed drawn to this quilt. At a certain point Mary and I decided to finish it together and that it belonged to her.

Every stitch was removed the first time

This was the first quilt I quilted solo on my long arm. After I finished the entire quilt I took it off the frame and noticed that one backside there was a fairly large portion where the tension was wrong which resulted in loose loops. I was heartbroken. I took it to Mary and she gently let me know that there were two choices--unpick the entire quilt using seam rippers or start over with new fabric. After a few tears, Mary and I began unpicking the stitches. Thirty hours and thousands of stitches later, it was time to sew the original quilt top with a new minky back. The second time there were no loose stitches and you would never have known.

I share this part of the quilt story because during this frustrating process, it made me think of what Terry endures. She is always in process of trying to get comfort from this  disorder. As soon as her muscles relax to the point that her neck and spine feel normal she knows that soon she will experience the tightening spasms. She experiences a period of pain to get to the part where she feels normal only to understand that she will start the cycle all over again.  I am so impressed with her as she endures these cycles with grace.

Ironically, we ended up gifting the quilt to Terry on  February 28 which is designated as Rare Disease Day.  Later the night Mary and I both received a text from Terry saying that each time she walked in and looked at her beautiful quilt, she knew it was stitched with love.

She is right, there is love in these stitches, including those that had to be unpicked...thanks Terry for the lessons you teach us all.

One of my favorites so far

After reading the post, Terry asked me to add this text response:

Oh my goodness Stacey, I can hardly see through all my tears. I'm not sure I'm worthy of all the wonderful things you said (she is) but I appreciate it with all my heart. I was truly drawn to this quilt while sewing a little on it not really knowing what it would look like. When the top was finished and I could see the whole design, it spoke to my heart. I'll always remember how much you struggled to finish the beautiful quilting. Just like the Lord works with us toward perfection, you never gave up till it was perfect for me! Whenever I look at it I know I'm loved. Thanks so very much. Love and hugs to you Stacey and Mary!

Quilt #72 Jan Sollis donated by Toni Martin, Ashlee Lloyd and Joyce Chinn

Jan Sollis and Toni Martin

Quilt #72 was created by Toni Martin and presented to Jan Sollis. I am so grateful for those who are participating in the creation and gifting of quilts as a part of The Duncan Project.

The Sollis and Martin families came to know each other well as their daughters grew up as friends and the families shared many events together. Jan was also Joyce's loving visiting teacher for over 14 years.

Toni wrote:

Ashlee, Jan, Megan, Toni and Toni's mother Joyce

While sitting in the memorial service for our family friend Tom Sollis, the room was simply filled with love. The Spirit whispered to me that Jan needed a Duncan quilt to honor her and her loving service. I shared this with my mom and daughter and we all felt  that this would honor both Jan and Tom. Tom's life was dedicated to family, his wife, hard work and loving and living the way the Savior did. Tom's life was lived with exactness in all things.

In the card I gave Jan that accompanied the quilt I told her that we made a heart quilt because it was symbolic of her great loves. First, the love that is shared in her large, beautiful family. They are a tribute to her and she is reaping what she has sown. Second, the love she has for Tom and the years of service she gave to him. Especially as he neared the end of his life. She was with him all day every day being his primary care giver and cheerleader.

Finally, her obvious love for, and trust in our Savior, Jesus Christ. I believe it is what carried her through and is still giving her the strength she needs to carry on without the love of her life.

Toni's daughter Ashlee was deeply influenced by this kind and loving couple and was there as well the night it was presented. Ashlee added, "Whenever you talked to Tom, he made you feel special and always had a kind word to say. Jan is equally loving, thoughtful and caring."  

Megan, Tom and Jan's daughter wrote this about her parents for this blog after Jan received the quilt:

Shortly before celebrating their 45th wedding anniversary Tom and Jan learned that Tom's prostate cancer had metastasized and was now spread throughout his body. For the next three years he would go through chemo, radiation and other various treatments. Through all this, our mom was by his side each day of those three years loving, supporting and caring for him, especially in his last few months of life as her care giving became a full time job. 

Two months before he passed away, the kids started helping with his care and were amazed as what she had been doing by herself, as they were now collectively trying to do. I think she would agree that though it was exhausting, it was fulfilling work. Our dad served everyone and it was a beautiful opportunity and an honor for all of us to serve him. 

I'm not sure how someone says goodbye to the love of their life but our mom is doing it and deserves a medal for her strength and resiliency.

We are all touched by the quilt she was given and all the work that went into it. As her daughter, I'm grateful to see that other people know how deserving she is of recognition and love. It's been a hard few years and that blanket is a beautiful reminder of how love is what helps us keep going and living.

Megan goes on to talk a little about her father and his life:

Tom Sollis was a faithful member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints and was one of the first 200 missionaries to enter the country of Italy. Tom served in the 142nd Linguistic Division of the National Guard from 1971 to 1977. He taught the Romanian language at the National Guard Armory in Salt Lake City.

Tom was a hard worker his entire life.  He had his first job at the age of 12 and as an adult became a Master Electrician and Contractor. He was a do-it-yourselfer and took pride in his work and loved helping his kids with projects. He loved his Heavenly Father and his Savior, Jesus Christ. He loved to serve and minister to others and always went about doing good. He cared about everyone  he came in contact with and helped them feel important and loved. He was an eternal optimist, always finding a reason to look on the bright side and be grateful in any situation. Tom was a wonderful grandfather and had a special relationship with each of his grandchildren.

It is very easy to see the concentric circles of love and influence that Tom and Jan had created both together and apart for this small season. I am so grateful they are part of The Duncan Project.

Love in the Stitches as they continue their journey.....

Quilt #71 Carrie Thompson donated by Sue Rogers

Carrie Thompson and Mary Duke as quilt was presented

Quilt #71 was presented to Carrie Thompson. This beautiful hand stitched quilt was donated by Sue Rogers.

Years ago Carrie's mother expressed a deep fear of nursing homes. Carrie promised her then that she would never be sent to a nursing home. When Carrie's father became ill, she drove flew to Utah from Washington to stay with him and assist him till he passed.

Eight years ago, Carrie's mother suffered a fall and broke her pelvis. Her mother had also began to experience the devastating effects of Alzheimer's. Carrie moved her mother in to live with her. Carrie's living room became a bedroom for her mom and her mother's cat complete with hospital bed. Carrie provided love, support and tender care for her mother for 8 years.

At the end of 2018, Carrie's husband was hospitalized with a severe lung infection and she lost a cherished cousin. All this, while continuing round the clock care for her mother.

A week after Carrie's husband returned home, her mother passed. Carrie is currently caring for her husband and preparing the memorial for her mother. She continues to care for her mother's beloved cat. Carrie's brother and sister helped to care for their mother during this difficult time.

This quilt was donated by Sue Rogers for Carrie. It is a beautiful king-size hand quilted blanket. The pattern is called flower garden and features green strips throughout the quilt that represents the vines or stems and leaves that grow in the garden. The varied colors depict the variety of flowers found in the garden and the yellow strips represent the bees that pollinate the flowers. The handwork on this quilt is amazing!

The quilt maker and sponsor wanted Carrie to know that there are many thinking and praying for her as she continues to provide love and support for her family.

Talking to Carrie about her mom was a beautiful privilege. I asked if she had had any sense of where her mother was now. She laughingly shared that she had a strong impression that her mom and the cousin that recently passed were together scouring thrift shops, a favorite pastime here on earth.

Caring for aging parents is such a loving gift of devotion. It is hoped that this quilt provides comfort in the quiet moments and speaks of a promise fulfilled. Love in the stitches...

Quilt #70 Duke Children donated by Mary Duke and Joyce Wickham

The Duke Children receiving their quilts on Christmas 2018. Ali. Maddi, Alex, Britni and TJ.

ennis

Shirley receiving Quilt #4 back in the summer
of 2016

This post lets me know that this project is starting to gain a life of its own. These four quilts were made by Mary Duke and her friend Joyce Wickham from the jeans of recipient #4 and her husband. Shirley and Dennis Sawyer were true examples of Christlike service. They both passed away in the last couple of years and these four quilts were created for Dennis and Shirley's grandchildren.

When Shirley was passing, she asked Mary to re-gift her quilt to someone in need. When Mary went to retrieve it, her father Don had it placed nearby and said he wasn't quite ready to part with it yet. It was one of the last items his wife has used and it held significance to him. 

That is the magic of quilts. When a quilt is gifted with love and meaning it is more than fabric and thread, it contains the deepest yearnings of our hearts to convey love, hope and good will (or whatever comfort is needed) from the creator to the receiver.

I feel so much gratitude when someone allows their quilts to be part of The Duncan Project. It reminds me of the connective threads of love we all share.

I can only envision Shirley and Dennis watching these quilts created from their clothes passed along to remind their grandchildren of their love and the legacy of their service.

Love in the stitches....

Quilt #69 Terina Holmes

Quilt #69 was presented to Terina Holmes. Terina is soon to leave the island (against her will). Hers is a military family so they go where they are required and she will be moving to Washington soon. I started a quilt for Terina with fabric reminescent of France (where she served her mission) but I just kept feeling that she needed fabric to remind her of her time here in Hawaii

.

There are so many things to love about Terina. She is a loyal friend and is fearless in defense of those who need her help. She is open and loving and does not shy away from the hard discussions. I personally think she has a gift to stand with those who can't stand for themselves. She openly shares her struggles and makes others feel free to do the same. 

Terina has been a great supporter of The Duncan Project. She has donated fabric. In addition, she provided me with names of people who could really use a quilt. She is aware of others and their needs and I have personally witnessed her serving in quiet ways. A key lime tart or a text message to check in and let others know they are loved.

Terina seems so at home at the beach. She is an expert at beach combing and makes her own jewelry with the treasures she has collected.

This quilt is one of my favorites and there is lots of love in the stitches for this wonderful friend and the child she has generously shared with me (Jacob).

Quilt # 66 Darci and Jared Jensen

Quilt #66 was given to Darci and Jared Jensen as a wedding present.

Darci is Duncan's aunt and so much more. She lived in the same home with him from the beginning to his passing at 2.5 years. Darci would often post pictures and videos of the nieces and nephews and it was clear that she cherished the relationships with these amazing and funny little children.

Opening the box.

Reading the card

Smiles and tears

Duncan's parents, grandparents and siblings were together when the quilt was opened. They sent a wonderful video and these still photos. Darci knew from the address on the box that it likely contained a Duncan Quilt. Her tears touch me greatly as they show me that she understands the love sewn into this quilt and Duncan's presence in the process. Also noteworthy is the look on her new husbands face. He was unaware of the project and was likely taken aback by all the tears in the room.

I worked with Darci when she served as a leader for the YCL's at Girls Camp. She has such a loving, generous, and inclusive spirit and she draws people in so easily. I have also heard her bear a powerful testimony and I know that she understands Duncan's current mission. Darci sent me a thank you and shared with me another tender mercy as Duncan's influence continues to be felt on this earth.

Darci and Duncan wearing crowns

This quilt just feels joyful and echoes both Darci and Duncan. Love in the stitches...

Wrapped in love. This quilt
has a minky back and was
long armed using the bubbles
pattern.

Quilt #68 Kristal Caldwell donated by Cherie Johnson and Stacey Tate

Cherie, Kristal and Stacey. Her quilt has cactus and arrow fabric. How cool is that!

Quilt #68 was given yesterday to Kristal Caldwell. Kristal has had a number of interesting challenges this past year. A serious injury to her achilles, her husbands year long deployment and the loss of an important family member.

I was texting with her yesterday and she remarked that in talking with her girls she couldn't understand why she was receiving a quilt. This was not a surprise. I have observed many times her coming to the aid of those in need but always remaining faithful and upbeat about her own circumstance.

Her sister that passed from cancer this last year was quilt recipient #46. I got to meet Sue last year and feel lucky to have known her.

Kristal is adopted and her story is quilt unique. She had shared it with a few of us personally, but upon her sister's passing, she bravely shared her adoption story with the world. She gave permission for me to share her post here. I am grateful because it is a truly beautiful story of love and sacrifice.

Kristal's words:

Kristal and her mom

"This post is raw, vulnerable, exposes secrets and is needed. If you want to learn about my life, my real life, read on. Today is Susan’s memorial. Since I can’t be there we are celebrating her life today. We had what most would consider a strange relationship but it worked for us and was perfect. I have been riddled with guilt wondering if I could have done things differently and should I have done things differently. Each time I do, I feel a comfort that all is well. I am sure it is her telling me she knows all my thoughts and feelings now and agrees we nailed it. My life has been perfect. I could not have written it better myself. I am who I am because of all the little pieces and big complicated pieces that have shaped me. I also would be nothing without the greatest parents Joe and Johnnie. I am grateful I can see Heavenly Fathers hand in my life and know from all that has happened that He is at the helm and I know He will guide me right, always.

Kristal and her biological mom Sue. I
was recently introduced to the term
"tummy mom."

So without further ado here is my tribute to my “momster”

You
By Kristal Caldwell

You became pregnant very young
You tried your best
You needed help
You knew I needed more
You made the ultimate sacrifice
You let me go knowing it was for the best
You gave up raising me so I could have it all
You struggled with the decision but endured
You let your parents adopt and raise me
You let her be my mom
You let me call her mom.
You played the role of sister and secret mom 
You watched my life from the outside 
You never complained
You always smiled and sang my praise
You taught me to be wild and free
You taught me selfless sacrifice
You taught me family is always there
You let me see your weaknesses so I could learn
You let me live my life the way I thought was best
You didn’t make me feel bad for the way I chose our relationship to be
You can’t be thanked enough 
You have all my gratitude 
You made the brave and right choice
You will be forever blessed
You were always there
You will always be
You are loved
You. You are my unsung hero"


Kristal comes from a legacy of love and her own life reflects that. There is love in the stitches for this generous and loving sister and friend.