Quilt #77 Sarah Bolor donated by Joan Schneiter and Jane Myrberg

Sarah Bolor with her Miracle Rose quilt

Quilt #77 was presented to Sarah Bolor by Kristi Bowman. The quilt was created by Joan Schneiter to honor Sarah's daughter Miracle Rose who passed away after a brief time on this earth.

Sarah chose to write and share her story:

The Bolor FIVE is how we define our family. This saying is a way we remain connected to our daughter, Miracle Rose. In July 2017, my husband and I learned that we were expecting our second

A wild horse came right up to Sarah while she was
carrying Miracle Rose

child. We were so excited for the family to be growing and I was secretly hoping it would be a little girl. As we entered our second trimester, we learned that our baby was, in fact. a girl and had a prenatal, fatal diagnosis of Edwards' Syndrome, aka Trisomy 18. Our physician reviewed all the potential medical anomalies and explained that there was a less than 5% chance that she would live past age one. I was devastated. My husband and I knew we had to power to choose how we responded to this news. To be honest, this was a defining moment for me. Almost as if, this was my first grown-up, independent decision and I knew I needed to be able to look myself in my eyes for the rest of my life and confidently know that I made the right decision. We thought long and hard about all options.

The Bolor Family on Miracle's birthday

Ultimately, we chose to love her and afford her the life that she was intended to have. For us, this meant we would place her on comfort measures once she was born and would not medically intervene to extend her life. We had accepted that this was her life regardless of the length of time she was with us. As I prepared for her delivery day, I knew I wanted to be the best possible mother I could be to her on the day we met and possibly the day she died. I did not want sadness to be the only feeling she felt from me. I wanted her to feel my happiness, love and excitement.

On February 21, 2017, Miracle Rose joined our family and she was perfect. She weighed a whopping 3 lbs. 7 ounces, but she was mighty. I was in heaven as I stared at my little girl. We spent the next 10 hours and 34 minutes cherishing every second together. We had a fashion show with leather hair bows and all, story time, a baptism, and introductions to all of her extended family members. I could not stop staring at her beautiful eyes, tiny hands, and feet and witness her bright spirit. At 8:43 pm, we said, "See you later girlfriend" and Miracle Rose passed on to heaven. She is my inspiration everyday. 

Miracle Rose

Over two years later, Miracle remains a part of our family. We have had a third child since and continue to include her in our daily conversations, prayers and memories. At some point each day, I close my eyes and take myself back to those 10 hours and 34 minutes, so I can be close to her and the time we spent together.

A little background on Sarah's quilt honoring Miracle Rose. There are times when I see a quilt kit that speaks to me and it is purchased without knowing who it belongs to. When Joan told me about her desire to make a quilt for Sarah to honor Miracle's life, I immediately remembered that I had a quilt with cabbage roses. Joan created this stunning quilt and it feel like another reminder of God's tender mercies.

Jane Myrberg and Joan Schneiter gifted this quilt to Saral

I am so impressed with this courageous mother and her intentional choices to savor every moment of her daughter's life. This sweet impact of this tiny girl will influence so many for years to come.

Love in this stitches for Sarah, Miracle Rose and the entire Bolor family.

Quilt #78 Jeremiah Stark

Jeremiah wrapped in his quilt

Quilt #78 was presented to Jeremiah Stark by Duncan's Great Grandmother Karen Stark. A month or so ago I received a text from Duncan's Grandmother, Charlene Duncan that her brother Jeremiah had just shared with the family that he has colon cancer. She asked me to make a quilt for him. She finished her text by saying she wanted him to feel the love in the stitches that I so often talk about.

Jeremiah or "Miah" as he is called by the family was a great support to the family when Duncan passed. When I asked for guidance on the type of quilt, Charlene wrote,"I don't know, just manly! He takes his role as provider  and protector very seriously. He is sweet and tender too. He gives the best hugs! And he'll just hold you as long as you need to be held. Strong and secure, yet tender and full of love. It makes me think of what it will be like to be in the Savior's arms."

What a great man!

Since Charlene's initial request, Jeremiah has had a couple of surgeries and will likely continue with chemo and radiation. 

Jeremiah and his wife Dori. Love the shaka.

I got word that the quilt had been gifted to Jeremiah by his mother Karen (who I was lucky enough to spend time with in Hawaii),

His first comments to his wife and Mom were "feel how soft." (I am using Minky on most of my quilt backs now for that very reason). And he also said that he loved that the pattern and colors were so "manly." (only slightly significant because I started one quilt but decided it would be put aside because the fabric contained the word darling. Needless to say every time I saw the word, I felt a small nudge that this wasn't exactly right for Jeremiah).  Karen let us know that tears were shed and he went off to bed that night with a big smile wrapped in his quilt. 

It is so fitting that he is part of The Duncan Project. Charlene sent me a text with the photos of Jeremiah and Dori that read, "Thank you again! it means so much to me to have Miah have a Duncan quilt. As I haven't been able to be there I've wanted him to feel our love for him in the stitches! I knew it would be a tender thing for him and Dori."

The quilt looks like it belongs in their home.

In one of our texts during the construction of the quilt, Charlene wrote, "One of the great Duncan lessons is that great trials bring great blessings as we accept the Lord's will and receive the enabling power He sends to help get us through. The "immediate goodness of God" is amazing and so real!" I feel so blessed by her wisdom.

I'm grateful to play a small part with this quilt and my prayers for strength and healing. Aloha is in the stitches for the whole family.

Quilt #76 Bennett Yorgason donated by Joan Schneiter and Jane Myrberg

Bennett Yorgason on his special I Spy quilt

This happy little guy is the first to be a part of two quilts. Quilt #44 was given to him and his mother almost two years ago. At that time, Bennett was facing serious health challenges but as you can see he is thriving.

Bennett and Grandma Joan

His Grandma Joan and Great Grandma Jane gave this I Spy quilt to Bennett. This amazing child has been a source of joy and learning for the entire family.

Joan writes:

Bennett is a joyous blessing in our lives! Now that he is almost 22 months old, he has shown us how to embrace each other and fully enjoy the little of life, such as laughing, hugging and cheering on milestones. We all love the cheesy smiles and all-in-hugs. Even the younger babies in the family love him and want to be close to sweet Bennett. Watching Bennett devour a peanut butter and jelly sandwich is a sight to behold--pure joy! He was once videotaped in his sleep and his Aunt Jenny captioned the video, "Dreaming  of  PBJ's."

Four generations: Bennett, his mom Karen, Grandma Joan
and Great Grandma Jane

Shortly after Bennett's birth, our favorite nurse, Dallin, told us we wouldn't see him as a child with Down syndrome because we would just see Bennett. That is so true! Every child is unique and special. We have learned to use "child first language." This means we don't say "Down syndrome kids or the Down syndrome boy or girl." When using terms like that it implies that the child is defined by their syndrome or disability which is simply not true and may be limiting. Thanks to the Down syndrome community we have learned many helpful and powerful ways to interact with children. Child first language should be used with all children and also adults. A child may have a disability or syndrome but they are not that disability or syndrome.

This little "I Spy" quilt is a celebration of Bennett''s 22 months in our family. Paddington Bear is in the corners of the quilt and a Paddington story panel is on the back celebrating Benny Boo's love for peanut butter and jelly. Marilyn Mott donated fabric to The Duncan Project and almost all of the fabric for this quilt come from dear Marilyn's generous donation. Thank you Marilyn!

I have been around Bennett a few times. He just exudes light and love. Tons of love in the stitches for Benny Boo.

Quilt #75 Reva Bain

The twins Reva Bain and Rada Morton

Quilt #75 was presented to Reva Bain. This one is a little self indulgent since it was sewn and gifted to my mother on her 85th birthday. I wanted to make her a quilt for this special day but also wanted to recognize something unique about my mom.

Rada, Reva (my sister), Reva (my mom) and me
my mother's favorite, The Olive Garden

My mother has such a generous heart. If there is someone in need and she has the ability to help, she doesn't hesitate. She has known in her life what it means to need a safe place to live for her and her children. As a result she has opened her home to a number of family members as a refuge for extended periods of time. Her home is a peaceful place.

My beautiful Aunt Rada recently lost her husband. She is still grieving and at the same time is struggling with the beginning stages of dementia.

She is now staying with my mom along with my sister who has had health challenges as well. It feels a little "Golden Girl" ish at her house now. I think it gives them all a greater sense of purpose, home and belonging.

 

Add two dogs and a cat to this home and you have quite a party.

There is love and admiration in the stitches for my generous mother.

Quilt #74 Marilyn Mott

Mary Duke, Marilyn Mott and DeAnn Magee. A few tears were shed as this beautiful quilter received her gift.

Quilt #74 was presented to Marilyn Mott. Marilyn is a very gifted, generous quilter. She has developed heart issues and has had at least 7 heart attacks in the last couple of years. For Marilyn, the scare of those heart attacks forced her to realize that she will never be able to use all her fabric in the time she has left. 

 As happens with many of us who love to quilt, the acquisition of beautiful fabric and patterns outstrips a quilters ability to actually use all the fabric we acquire. Drug addicts and quilters share a common term--a stash. In the case of quilters, it is the term for fabric that is not intended for a specific quilt. but the purchaser is convinced it will be NEEDED for a future project. Many quilters can produce numerous quilts from their "stash" without purchasing any additional fabric (I should note that this is rarely done because one of the best parts of quilting is fabric shopping. So fun to dream that it can become addictive. Fat quarters, jelly rolls, layer cakes, oh my...

Marilyn over many years had developed a beautiful. substantial stash worth thousands of dollars. Given her current health, she knew she would be unable to use the fabric. The second thing I should explain about quilters it that giving away this treasured fabric which may have taken years to curate is difficult. and donating it through traditional means, i.e. Deseret Industries, is akin to allowing your child to go to foster care. Marilyn began looking for a  better place to re-home her treasured stash.

Enter Marilyn's dear friend  of many years, DeAnn Magee. DeAnn has for a number of years had her hair done by Mary Duke and one day while getting her hair done is clicked. Mary, her stylist is an avid quilter and DeAnn was able to facilitate Marilyn's desire to see her beautiful fabric go to someone who would put it to good use. 

A number of  us were about to share in the gift of Marilyn's fabric. This quilt was created and sewn by the many grateful recipients and contains fabric almost exclusively  from Marilyn's stash in her favorite jewel tones.

Marilyn and DeAnn continue to use their sewing  skills The currently make small toys in the hundreds which they donate to animal shelters.

There is much love, prayers for improved health and gratitude in the stitches for Marilyn from those of us who have been entrusted with her collection and a promise to make good use of this treasure.

Quilt #73 Terry Powell donated by Mary Duke and Stacey Tate

Stacey, Terry and Mary

 Quilt #73 was gifted to Terry Powell. Since being back in Utah, I have spent some quality time with Terry and really appreciate her strength. Terry embodies the concept of endurance. She suffers with a rare neurological disorder called Cervical Dystonia for which there is no cure.

The disorder is characterized by involuntary contractions in the neck causing pain. possible twisting and distortion of the neck. One of the things that helps Terry's symptoms are botox shots which she receives about every three months. The botox helps but she generally has a short period of time before the botox wears off and the spasms begin anew causing the contracting and pain all over again.

Mary and I had talked about making a quilt for Terry. At our weekly quilting get together, I was working on this quilt  when Terry volunteered to sew a couple of seams. She remarked on how beautiful it was and each additional step she seemed drawn to this quilt. At a certain point Mary and I decided to finish it together and that it belonged to her.

Every stitch was removed the first time

This was the first quilt I quilted solo on my long arm. After I finished the entire quilt I took it off the frame and noticed that one backside there was a fairly large portion where the tension was wrong which resulted in loose loops. I was heartbroken. I took it to Mary and she gently let me know that there were two choices--unpick the entire quilt using seam rippers or start over with new fabric. After a few tears, Mary and I began unpicking the stitches. Thirty hours and thousands of stitches later, it was time to sew the original quilt top with a new minky back. The second time there were no loose stitches and you would never have known.

I share this part of the quilt story because during this frustrating process, it made me think of what Terry endures. She is always in process of trying to get comfort from this  disorder. As soon as her muscles relax to the point that her neck and spine feel normal she knows that soon she will experience the tightening spasms. She experiences a period of pain to get to the part where she feels normal only to understand that she will start the cycle all over again.  I am so impressed with her as she endures these cycles with grace.

Ironically, we ended up gifting the quilt to Terry on  February 28 which is designated as Rare Disease Day.  Later the night Mary and I both received a text from Terry saying that each time she walked in and looked at her beautiful quilt, she knew it was stitched with love.

She is right, there is love in these stitches, including those that had to be unpicked...thanks Terry for the lessons you teach us all.

One of my favorites so far

After reading the post, Terry asked me to add this text response:

Oh my goodness Stacey, I can hardly see through all my tears. I'm not sure I'm worthy of all the wonderful things you said (she is) but I appreciate it with all my heart. I was truly drawn to this quilt while sewing a little on it not really knowing what it would look like. When the top was finished and I could see the whole design, it spoke to my heart. I'll always remember how much you struggled to finish the beautiful quilting. Just like the Lord works with us toward perfection, you never gave up till it was perfect for me! Whenever I look at it I know I'm loved. Thanks so very much. Love and hugs to you Stacey and Mary!

Quilt #72 Jan Sollis donated by Toni Martin, Ashlee Lloyd and Joyce Chinn

Jan Sollis and Toni Martin

Quilt #72 was created by Toni Martin and presented to Jan Sollis. I am so grateful for those who are participating in the creation and gifting of quilts as a part of The Duncan Project.

The Sollis and Martin families came to know each other well as their daughters grew up as friends and the families shared many events together. Jan was also Joyce's loving visiting teacher for over 14 years.

Toni wrote:

Ashlee, Jan, Megan, Toni and Toni's mother Joyce

While sitting in the memorial service for our family friend Tom Sollis, the room was simply filled with love. The Spirit whispered to me that Jan needed a Duncan quilt to honor her and her loving service. I shared this with my mom and daughter and we all felt  that this would honor both Jan and Tom. Tom's life was dedicated to family, his wife, hard work and loving and living the way the Savior did. Tom's life was lived with exactness in all things.

In the card I gave Jan that accompanied the quilt I told her that we made a heart quilt because it was symbolic of her great loves. First, the love that is shared in her large, beautiful family. They are a tribute to her and she is reaping what she has sown. Second, the love she has for Tom and the years of service she gave to him. Especially as he neared the end of his life. She was with him all day every day being his primary care giver and cheerleader.

Finally, her obvious love for, and trust in our Savior, Jesus Christ. I believe it is what carried her through and is still giving her the strength she needs to carry on without the love of her life.

Toni's daughter Ashlee was deeply influenced by this kind and loving couple and was there as well the night it was presented. Ashlee added, "Whenever you talked to Tom, he made you feel special and always had a kind word to say. Jan is equally loving, thoughtful and caring."  

Megan, Tom and Jan's daughter wrote this about her parents for this blog after Jan received the quilt:

Shortly before celebrating their 45th wedding anniversary Tom and Jan learned that Tom's prostate cancer had metastasized and was now spread throughout his body. For the next three years he would go through chemo, radiation and other various treatments. Through all this, our mom was by his side each day of those three years loving, supporting and caring for him, especially in his last few months of life as her care giving became a full time job. 

Two months before he passed away, the kids started helping with his care and were amazed as what she had been doing by herself, as they were now collectively trying to do. I think she would agree that though it was exhausting, it was fulfilling work. Our dad served everyone and it was a beautiful opportunity and an honor for all of us to serve him. 

I'm not sure how someone says goodbye to the love of their life but our mom is doing it and deserves a medal for her strength and resiliency.

We are all touched by the quilt she was given and all the work that went into it. As her daughter, I'm grateful to see that other people know how deserving she is of recognition and love. It's been a hard few years and that blanket is a beautiful reminder of how love is what helps us keep going and living.

Megan goes on to talk a little about her father and his life:

Tom Sollis was a faithful member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints and was one of the first 200 missionaries to enter the country of Italy. Tom served in the 142nd Linguistic Division of the National Guard from 1971 to 1977. He taught the Romanian language at the National Guard Armory in Salt Lake City.

Tom was a hard worker his entire life.  He had his first job at the age of 12 and as an adult became a Master Electrician and Contractor. He was a do-it-yourselfer and took pride in his work and loved helping his kids with projects. He loved his Heavenly Father and his Savior, Jesus Christ. He loved to serve and minister to others and always went about doing good. He cared about everyone  he came in contact with and helped them feel important and loved. He was an eternal optimist, always finding a reason to look on the bright side and be grateful in any situation. Tom was a wonderful grandfather and had a special relationship with each of his grandchildren.

It is very easy to see the concentric circles of love and influence that Tom and Jan had created both together and apart for this small season. I am so grateful they are part of The Duncan Project.

Love in the Stitches as they continue their journey.....